It's back...

Well, it's back. That spirit is back. The spirit of craving. The spirit of adventure! This passionate desire to do something. The unquenchable thirst for this thing is back!

I never know what to do with it! It makes me want to run, run fast, run far, in infinitely green meadows. It makes me want to go explore, take adventures and risks. To do something I've never done. 

It makes me need.

It stirs up tiny dreams that have been hidden deep down. It taunts my vivid imagination. It provokes my inner child to burst forth and fly.

It sends my mind reeling and my heart beating.

It makes me want to join a convent, backpack across Europe, sail around the world, become a pirate, dive into days of visions from the Lord, scream out loud, paint wildly, dance furiously.

It stirs passion. It says something amazing has to happen. now! It makes me crave, it makes me drool for more.

But it has got to be from God.

Uncle Bob

One time when I was in middle school my Uncle Bob came into town. Now, anytime U-Bob visited it was always a special occasion. This time was no different and my parents let me go to school late so I could visit longer with Uncle Bob who dropped me off at school on his way out of town. When I got to class all my friends asked where I had been and I told them I was with my Uncle Bob and they all thought I was making him up! "Yeah, sure, "Uncle Bob" Okay..."

But it was true.

To Uncle Bob, who taught me all my sass.

Survival

You know those times when you are out of your comfort zone or in an unfamiliar place and, in every way of the word, you need God. 

You need him to be right beside you, you need to read his words, you need to listen to his music, you. need. him.

This is what I like to call survival mode. 

Where you know that if you didn't immerse yourself with him you would just die.

Or that something uncomfortable would happen.

Honestly it feels good to be in survival mode. 

I feel fairly close to the Lord in survival mode

 even when the walls still feel like they are closing in.

But why can't survival mode be every day mode?

Going back to when we first fell in love mode.

Where we couldn't get enough of God, when I wanted to read his words.

When I wanted to sing his songs.

When I wanted Him to be close to me all the time, 

to lean on his shoulder and just talk.

What some like to call the "honeymoon phase."

But why does it have to be a phase? Why can't it be a life style?

I wish it was my life style, 

where I am so passionately in love with God I can't help but be in His word all the time.

Where I can't help but sing songs for Him.

Where I don't want to run away from Him.

Where I can't help but bask in His love for me and me for him.

Oh, what a world that would be.